I can feel it

I've been so up and down lately it's hard to know whether a feeling will last for more than a moment. Lately all I can do is act as a vessel through which these emotions flow through- try not to freak out and just enjoy it. That's meant crying a lot at uni, wiping away the tears, reapplying makeup and then getting on with the job. Talking about my feelings with good friends, no matter how irrational and strange they might seem has really helped me a lot. My friends have been unbelievably patient and supportive throughout the last couple of months and I feel truly blessed. I didn't have the same support network when I went through high school, then again I never quite felt like this in high school. I chased boys but never was my love reciprocated. In many ways I was a late bloomer, although now I know that not to be true. I mentioned a few weeks ago I thought I wanted time alone and to grow but it turns out all I really wanted was friendship.

1- Naomi Campbell, 2- Angelina Jolie. 3- Larissa Hofmann at Fausto Puglisi Spring 2015 Backstage, 4- Ali Michael shot by Petra Collins, styled by Alexandra Horton, 5- A special MEAT by Nicolas Coulomb by Georgia Pendlebury & Florence Tétier. 7 & 10- Kate Bogucharskaia at Andrew Gn Spring 2014 PFW, 9- Baby It's You lookbook by Shop Tunnel Vision. 11- unknown via. 12- via, 14.
6, 8, 13- Marina Fini tumblr.

Lady Petrov'as tips for Blogging

You may remember several weeks ago I got to attend Lady Petrova's Social Media Socialite Class- this class in particular was aimed at how companies can better use social media to promote the aesthetic of their store, but a lot of these tips were applicable to fashion bloggers too. Obviously I can't give away all her magical secrets (and highly recommend that if you are in Melbourne you attend her next class!) so instead I wanted to present just some of her blogging tips. Of course, many of you will already be familiar with some of these but if you, like me follow blogging intuitively rather than from a manual than hopefully there will be something useful for you. So, without further ado:

1.) Know your audience: for many bloggers, they are trying to attract the attention of like-minded people or inspire others. I try and present an alternative in how to approach personal style and frequently break so-called fashion rules and twist the narrative. Featuring the work of others who I admire is also important as it forces me to consider what I like and dislike about their brand and how it relates to me on a very personal level. I also frequently check what other blogs my followers are reading as a way of expanding my own social circle and think about what my *competitors* are offering.

2.) Every single post needs to add value to the reader's lives. This means no fodder! Often when I review a brand it is important for me to offer a personal opinion or find some kind of pop culture reference rather than summarize what others have already written. Writing style is therefore important, as well as the editing process in order to avoid grammatical errors and inaccurate information. You want to avoid being contacted by a company correcting you, which is the online equivalent to your pants spontaneously dropping.

3.) Organise your social media. If you're like me and studying full-time then it means scheduling content ahead of time. This gives me more time to edit photos and structure paragraphs around a collection, as well as grouping together certain clusters of posts by aesthetic. In case you haven't noticed I'm a bit of a control freak and this works well for me on many levels but if you enjoy being a bit more spontaneous you can schedule some posts.  Unfortunately this means that I don't really have the chance to discuss things as they happen and post in real-time. That's what apps like Instagram are for, which leads me to:

4.) Posting regularly. While I have managed to master regular content on my blog I often forget to update my instagram and twitter accounts regularly. However, these make a big difference in my weekly and monthly stats and I would consider them necessary as part of the bigger picture. It's also important to establish which social media stream is your "home base" and what other channels are accessory to that. So for example, I use Tumblr, Twitter and Instagram (rarely Facebook) to redirect traffic back to my blog and use that as my home base. 

5.) Think about what things look like on your phone. What's the thing we are constantly criticized for? You're always on your phone/ obsessed with your phone/ attached to the phone. There's a theory that if aliens floated down to observe the human race they would probably think these little rectangles were necessary to our existence. However, many teens and twenty-something year old's use their phones in order to connect with the people they feel most attached to, but also read blogs and shop online. A basic understanding of coding will be really useful in aligning every image and making everything look much neater!

While there were other gems of wisdom I picked up throughout the course of the afternoon I would say these are the most helpful, but there's also this really useful thing called the Internet which you can use to search for something as specific as running an instagram account or translating each step of MyIdol (remember that guys????). It's all part of making these everyday things part of your routine in the revolving door of, "hey I exist! I'm here!" whilst offering something unique and different.

1- Acer X Christian Cowan-Sanluis. 2 & 6- Photos by Petra Collins for Dazed Digital.3, 5 & 7- Arvida Byström. 4- Tavi Gevinson & Iris Apfel.

girls! girls! girls!

Last month I went to see the Girlhood Art Exhibition at the Union Club Hotel in Fitzroy with Kelly from glitterous clitoris, possibly the greatest named blog ever, since she made two of the works on display there. I really wanted to go since it had been ages since I last saw her and I was extremely mad at my boyfriend and needed to surround myself with lots of art made by awesome girls. For anyone who cares he did apologise to me for that thing. Like the name would suggest there was lots of pink, my favourite piece being a small child-size tent (OK that sounds super creepy but it was magical, I promise!) decked out in Where The Wild Things Are sheets, pink tablecloths and paper doilies with secret messages on them. The tent floor was also covered in glitter which was an added bonus, so after we got up there was a glittery trail following behind us like a pair of snails. I preferred seeing the exhibition with someone else because as always Kelly wore an amazing outfit and I got to photograph her interacting with the other works.

What I found really interesting was the sheer amount of nature referenced by a number of different artists, whether that be portraiture in the woods, flowers or sketches of beetles. The more I research insects for my university project, the more critical I am of how they appear in art. I was unable to enjoy some of the more stylised interpretations and could only think within the parameters of a scientist, instantly dismissing that which was not anatomically correct. It's interesting to not how my brain is changing because I very much doubt I would have cared about that kind of stuff when I was studying insects for zoology. 

While it probably would have been better to attend the exhibition's opening on a Friday night, I enjoyed getting to mill around and view each piece at my own leisure. Also the mid-afternoon sun tinged each of my photos with a certain nostalgia which I then exaggerated in post-production. The various holes in the walls from the last girlhood exhibition and slightly tacky flooring (which I was totally into) had nuance all of their own. The muted noise from the punters downstairs were constant reminders of the exhibition's location above a pub, but I much prefer it over tonnes of people. There were only a couple other people on the Sunday that we went, one girl who was taking pictures on her Nikon was also wearing black Dr Martens. Kelly and I were also wearing the same shoes which was super cool. The only thing left is to pick which pet animal you need to join our witch cult. But seriously you guys, it was like being surrounded by all cool feminist blogs and instagram accounts. 

where do I belong?

Basically after completing my "I'm a Scientist Too" post and feeling on top of the world, I was asked to stop using the lab space as an office and it opened up so many old scars about not fitting in and my general existence being a detriment to other people. I like working where I do because I get to talk to other people about their research, and felt like I was part of the scientific community. Now being pushed aside and toppled off my perch I just feel at a total loss for words and lack any motivation to complete my work. I never cried at uni until that afternoon when I had to quick as I could run to a bathroom stall because I could not for the life of me hold it in anymore. Contrary to popular belief, women don't cry in order to get attention or get their own way and I can never dispel the feeling of complete and utter shame when salty tears involuntarily roll down my cheeks. I'm sorry, I don't like to add to the noise of the Internet and generally avoid self-serving posts but I just feel like in order to create distance between myself and this sense of displacement they needed to exist in a place outside of my own head.

I didn't like the way in which I was asked, how I was spoken to but what hurt was the feeling that I didn't belong because I finally thought I had everything figured out. I would go on to do a PhD, continue doing work which I loved and felt passionate about which would be difficult but rewarding in the end. It never occurred to me that the work environment would suddenly become hostile or that my legitimacy would be questioned. Nor did I consider that in that situation I would be unable to do anything to help my situation or that it would totally change how I function and where I complete my work. There's not a lot I can do other than stay out of their way and at home, since I need the assistance of this person in my research and I'm going to have to complete field work with them. I'm just super bummed out about the whole situation and feel like in the workplace we are still subject to the same childish games we had to endure in high school and frankly it's a real let down. Maybe things never really get better, they just get different. 

1- Heavenly Creatures (1994), 2- The Virgin Suicides (1999), 3- Photography by Gregory Crewdson, 4, 5- days of sleep by somnials and staticpool modelling, 6, 8- Hilary Faye Sloane, 9- still from an Alfred Hitchcock film, 10- Style Rookie, 12 & 13- via Style Abuse. 7 & 11- source.